Thursday, July 8, 2010

A Laundry Strike

Dear Family:

Effective immediately, I will no longer be turning every piece of laundry right side out as I am folding it. This means one sock will be right side out, one not. Your panties will be wrong side out. Your shorts will be neatly folded, and placed on your bed for YOU to put away wrong side out!

Unless of course, miracles begin to rain down from heaven, and you stop pulling every stitch of clothing off of your body in such a way that it ends up wrong side out. In this highly unlikely scenario, you will find your clothes neatly folded and lying on your bed RIGHT side out.

Revolutionary, I know.

Darling Studmuffin. You are the best. I truly could not ask for a better husband. However, in light of the stance I am taking with our precious daughters, I find it only fair to hang up your polo shirts wrong side out. Your underwear will not be simply pull from drawer and wear. No. You will now have to stop and turn right side out EVERY. SINGLE. PAIR. Unless of course, by some amazing occurrence you decide not to wad them up in a ball of wrong-side-outness as you take them off...

And, yes I did just discuss your underwear habits with the entire blogosphere as a witness...

Truly, I'm sorry to take such a drastic stance, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

Bookworm, I realize that finding your clothes wrong side out is going to totally upset the perfect balance of orderliness and cleanliness that is your room. For this, I can only say: TURN YOUR CLOTHES RIGHT SIDE OUT WHEN YOU THROW IT IN THE HAMPER!!!! Lo and Behold, your clothes will once again be magically right side out when you put them away.

Precious Popcorn, I also realize that you will probably not bother to correct any of the wrong side out clothes as you put them away. In fact, I am already quite sure you will wear your socks and underwear wrong side out, rather than be troubled to correct them. I have decided I'm okay with this. Inevitably this will result in your socks & underwear being RIGHT side out every other time you wear them...

Just as a quick recap/reminder: The laundry fairy does not come to our house. If you need something clean, put it in the hamper. Tell me you are out of clean pants/shorts whatever, and I will be more than happy to launder it. However, since the laundry fairy has failed to show up these past 14 years, you WILL be required to put away your own laundry, and possibly fold it on occasion.

Thank you for your attention and assistance in the above matter.

Sincerely,

The Laundress, AKA, your wife and mother

12 comments:

Amy said...

I could not have said it better. Well said! I too have learned that the 'laundry fairy' is on hiatus, never to return...

Anonymous said...

Strangly my guys are good at not turning their clothes inside out when removing. UNFORTUNATELY, they have all sorts of things that stay hidden in pockets...small pellets for their soft air guns and mister twister fishing grubs end up in my washer all the time. They don't leave $ cause then it becomes MINE :-D
Love you
Paula, your sister that doesn't blog

Southern Gal said...

Amen!! You go! I quit with the socks long ago. My men/boys all expect to have to turn their sock right side out if they put them in the hamper that way.

Dawn said...

I don't do the girls laundry so I can't complain anymore, but If it's wrong side out out of the dryer, that's how it gets folded--if I fold it--sometimes I just sort. And sometimes it sits in a basket a lo-ng time!

serialswooper.com said...

My kids and husband would walk around with their clothes inside out just to spite me.

Nice going. Plant that foot firmly.

thelumberjackswife said...

Brilliant! This idea has never occurred to me!

Marilyn said...

Why did it take you so long to remember that??? As the MOM I made that rule quite early. Maybe you all turned them as your wore them. The Rancher hated his underwear turned wrong though. Personally, I couldn't see the difference except for the brand name label. My special treat was to wash a $5 bill. What I found in the washer was and still is mine.

云依恩HFH謝鄭JTR安 said...

人生是故事的創造與遺忘。............................................................

Stephanie said...

Hahaha! It was only yesterday when I put my foot down and made my seven and eight year old boys go through every single item of dirty laundry and figure out if it was inside out or not and rectify the situation in hopes that it would deter them in the future. But I found more inside out socks in the new dirties this morning!!!

Roni said...

LOL! I am slowly but surely gaining ground in the laundry area. I, too, do not turn clothes right side out. Socks in a ball end up wet and still in a ball as they come out of the dryer. I don't find many socks in a ball anymore! And my 13-year-old has been doing all her own laundry for over a year now! I don't know that you'll win the battle, but hang in there to win the war, girl!!

said...

人生匆匆-把握當下,支持鼓勵~事事如意~..................................................................

Anonymous said...

Did you know that some washers actually turn the clothes wrong side out while washing? Polo shirts for sure!
Aunt C