Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Pitiful...

That's what I am today. I am pitiful.

I've had a sore throat since last Thursday. I stayed home from the festivities for my 15 year reunion Saturday to try and get well. Yesterday I decided I would be better today. I like affirmative decisions...

What I don't like is when my body refuses to cooperate with my decisions. I went to work today and tried to pretend I was well. They sent me home, and I called the doctor.

I called a doctor...

That is a sign of my level of pitifulness. As a nurse, I firmly believe I don't need no stinkin' doctors. I can self diagnose and treat most maladies with over the counter remedies...Just like any other self respecting nurse. However, doctors have a very important power that I do not possess. It is the power of RX. I drug my pitiful tutkus to the doctor, hacked and coughed, hacked and coughed, and informed her that I have bronchitis, and I was pretty sure I might have to give up the healing powers of endless glasses of hot water and chamomile tea, as those did not seem to be healing me. She did a peak flow test on me, and sure enough my lung function was about half what it should be...She gave me a breathing treatment and a steroid shot, called in an inhaler and steroid pack, and sent me home to "sleep and drink orange juice."

So, it seems I did need a stinkin' doctor today. And I have slept most of today. Except when I wake up coughing, unable to catch my breath, and have to drink more hot water to get my larynx to relax.

I had to email Studmuffin the grocery list, so I thought I'd take time to tap a quick post to you, Gentle Reader, and share my woes...

Hey, here's an interesting tidbit for you:

Okay, most of you will know this, but those of you who have not had the privilege of birthing babies will not understand. Drinking endless glasses of hot water and gallons of chamomile tea results in one thing: Frequent trips to the bathroom. If you don't go as soon as you have the slightest twinge from your bladder, a coughing spasm will hit, and you will sure wish you hadn't ignored that twinge.

Now. Wasn't that a lovely image?

Your welcome.

Oh, and I must add here: Once upon a time in the land of before I had borne children, my sister mentioned laughing until she wet her pants...I rolled my eyes, and mentally said, "That will never happen to me." And then, I had a baby, and got pregnant again when my first was 8 months old. Did you know it takes your vaginal wall a full 2 years to regain its previous muscle tone? My gynecologist informed me of this after I was pregnant again. I had the unfortunate experience of not only laughing until I wet my pants, but coughing, sneezing, and of course, vomiting several times a day, all with the risk of wetting my pants if my bladder wasn't good and emptied... I actually got to where I would go to the bathroom because I was having premonitions of vomiting... Good times. Good times. Thankfully, this went away for the most part after I had given my body enough time to tighten back up after Popcorn was born. So it appears, that again, I have my sister to thank for any physical malady that I develop, because I'm pretty sure she has the gift of prophecy, or the gift of hexing me, or something....

And, excuse me, Gentle Reader, but was this post too much information for your delicate constitution? If so, please accept my apologies...

2 comments:

Dawn said...

So am I the sister being blamed for this too???? If so, it's a good deal I'm the oldest so I can take it and am used to it!

Roni said...

Feel better soon!! Sorry you are sickly. :-(