Sunday, November 15, 2009

MY Mop Bucket: A Rant

The mop bucket is MY mop bucket. If you actually use the mop or ever get the random impulse to clean a floor I would be more than happy to share my mop bucket with you. However, as I am the only one in this house who mops the floor 99% of the time, I will continue to claim the mop bucket as mine.

It is not the pool chemical bucket, and should not be used as such. There are at least 4 empty chlorine buckets that can be used quite handily for mixing pool chemicals. Therefore, I should not have to go searching for MY mop bucket and find it next to the baking soda and chemical strips in the shop. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.

MY mop bucket is not a bucket to wash your car with. Please refer to earlier references to empty chlorine buckets, or better yet, you can even use the lovely lime green bucket that blew into our yard a few months ago. It is a very cute, lightweight lime green bucket, complete with a handy dandy carrying handle...But alas, it is too small for my mop to fit into. Hence, it is not, nor will it ever be MY mop bucket. It will make a lovely car wash bucket for your use. Since there is an adequate supply of buckets for washing your pickup I should not find the mop bucket next to the jug of Nu Finish car cleaner at the back of the garage on the bottom shelf covered by towels and sponges and various other car care paraphernalia. Thank you for your cooperation in this manner.

MY mop bucket is not to be used to haul your toys around the yard with. You have numerous cutesy bags that have been given to you for the sole purpose of carting your treasures around our little corner of the world. Therefore there is no reason for my to find the mop bucket under your swing set. Please understand, it is MY mop bucket, as I am the sole person who mops in the family. Should you wish to take over mopping, I would be glad to share the use of it with you. However, until that time arrives, which will probably about the same time that you start to hang your towels on the rod without being told, or put your dirty socks somewhere besides the middle of the floor, aka when cows jump over the moon, I appreciate your cooperation in keeping MY mop bucket by the back door of the garage where I can easily find it.

MY mop bucket has ONE purpose. It's pretty amazing actually. It serves as a bucket for filling with hot water and a splash of bleach or vinegar...Or if I'm feeling really adventurous and extravagant it may even get a splash of Simple Green. Amazing, I know. Then, after it is filled with hot water and the desired cleaning agent, it is carried to a hard floor that has just been swept. Then, now hold on, because this is pretty exciting....I put a MOP into MY mop BUCKET and I MOP THE FLOORS!!!


Sheer, and utter genius!

So. There you have it. The mop bucket is MY mop bucket.

End of story.

1 comment:

Dawn said...

So if I need to carry a bucket of dirt at your house I'd better look elsewhere???? :)

Great post!

You should get a facebook account and post it for all your friends to read and see your genius!