The Twilight Zone

Do you ever sit back and say "Did I really just DO that?  Who's life am I livin' anyway?"

 

This weekend my brother was nearby visiting his daughter and going to a football game with her.  I invited him to watch Bookworm play at our local high school play off game.  They let the junior high band play for the last home game...

 

Apparently, there was a football game going on. 

 

And I actually enjoyed it.

 

Until my brother and niece left at halftime, because her lactose intolerant self ate cheese at a Mexican place before coming...

 

Then it was just mostly Popcorn and I, sitting and freezing with me watching people and her complaining of being cold and that she hates football and her head hurt...

 

"We can't leave.  We are here to hear your sister play."

 

Because surely that's why 99% of people go to games...To listen to the band.

 

Popcorn's reply? "The band is playing?" 

My child is 4th flute from the left

So, she was loving all aspects of the game.

 

The best part of the game for me?  Well a gentleman behind me was watching his grandson play.  At one point he yelled "HELLFIRE!"  And I couldn't help but turn around, look at him and laugh.  Then he asked what was so funny...And then I felt weird and decided he must not have yelled "HELLFIRE" in the game.  And then he wouldn't let it drop.  And then I told him what I THOUGHT he said.  Turns out a good understanding of the game would've helped here as he was yelling "HORSECOLLAR!" 

 

*SIGH*

 

He was still laughing at me when the game was over.

 

Then, today out of the blue Popcorn informs she'd like some Miss Me jeans.

 

Excuse me?  Who's child IS this?  "Mom, everyone has them..."  

 

"Everyone?  Does Jordan?  Or Amanda?  I know Austyn has them, but only as a hand me down from a sister who was GIVEN them as a hand me down.  I can put rhinestones on your jeans."

 

HOLD THE FRONT DOOR!  Did I just say I'd bedazzle something?  And did I just mix my euphemisms?  Is that a euphemism?  WHAT is a euphemism?  Oh, wait.  I googled.  It's an idiom.  Here's the deal:  Does one need to know the correct label for such things once they aren't required to label them by a grammar teacher?  I think not.

Next thing ya know I'm buying a bedazzler for $9.99 at Walmart and trying it out on a pair of jeans she doesn't like.  BIZARRE.  There is a big downside here.  The thing doesn't fit in her pockets so she will officially not be able to use her pockets now.  If she ever did anyway.

 

Don't worry.  I'm feeling like my old self now.  I went on a manic quick clean up spree before Brent gets home from scouting deer, and I'm about to lie down and read a book.  Then everything will be back to normal.

 

I hope.