Sickliness and Thoughts...

I've decided that we should build on to our house.  I think we should turn our bedroom into a family room, and build out to make a larger master bedroom and bedroom for Popcorn.  If possible, we can tear down the wall between our existing rooms and make a larger den.  If not, then Popcorn's existing room can be an office, and the other a den.

I have not discussed any of this with my husband.

He will argue and list all of the ways this is not possible.  Money, easements, money, time, unstable economy, money....I will weep and wail and moan and eventually stick out my chest, all to no avail.

So.  I will simply share this little fantasy with you for now.

I am bored.

Yes.  I said it.  The word that I do not allow my kids to utter.  Popcorn was sick last Wednesday through Monday.  Bookworm has been sick since Friday.  She started vomiting last night, which was something new.  She is white as a sheet, and at this point I can't imagine her going to school tomorrow.  Yesterday I went between complete exhausted, head congested, eyes aching, unable to breathe, to brief spurts of energy where I would do a load of laundry or empty the dishwasher, then be completely exhausted, and my head would feel as if it was going to topple off of my shoulders.  And that was while taking pseudoephedrine and drinking cups of Earl Grey and chamomile tea.  The only time my throat wasn't killing me was while drinking a hot beverage, so I alternated the two.

Last night I was tired of the television playing kid shows all day.  And I had no desire to look at the computer or a book.

I made Studmuffin play Scrabble with me.  Actually, he suggested it, as he figured he could beat me in my weakened state.  He started out with a 96 point word.  He spelled "soldier," used all of his tiles, got a 50 point bonus, plus a double word score.  I never did catch up after that.  However, we followed that up with Seinfeld Scene It, and I won at that one.  Barely. 

I couldn't sleep last night.  I was hot, then freezing, then hot...Then Bookworm would start hollering my name, and we'd meet up in the bathroom and she'd puke while I held her hair.  I'd give her a cold rag and water to rinse her mouth out, then I'd stomp back in the bedroom and glare at my husband's sleeping form as I crawled back in bed bouncing and yanking the covers as much as possible in an effort to disturb his sleep. 

It didn't work.  By 5:30, when I'd had maybe 3 hours of sleep.  I crawled in bed, and sat up on my elbows and put my face nose to nose to him and stared at him until he woke up. 

He nearly fell backwards out of bed, "What the....?"

"How can you sleep through all of that?"  I barked.  Then I yanked all of the covers off of him, tucked them around me and turned my back to him...

Bookworm yelled "Daddy!!!" maybe 10 minutes later. 

HE DID NOT WAKE UP!  So, I did what every mother has to do in those situations. 

I kicked him.

He actually stirred.  I said very LOUDLY, "It's your turn."  And I may have kicked him again.

The important thing to note here is he actually got out of bed.  And I finally slept.  With no more cold/hot flashes. 

And I actually ate breakfast this morning and it tasted good.

But my child is still pitiful.

I think maybe I will clean out Popcorn's drawers while they are at church this morning.  Then, if I'm lucky, I will be able to convince her to part with some toys today. 

But I'm not promising anything on that score.  I used to simply suggest that she had to get rid of or figure out how to make her room neater, and she'd willingly part with all sorts of stuff.  She has started to dig in her heels, and is now unable to part with much of anything...

What did you get accomplished this weekend?  Hanging out with friends?  Did you go out and enjoy beautiful weather?  Perhaps you cleaned a closet...Do tell!

Fluffiness, Calories Burned, and A Lecture...

I just can't decide if Oliver is fairing so well this winter.

 Seriously.  He wasting away before my very eyes.

 I decided to weigh him a week or so ago.  Translation:  I made Studmuffin weigh himself, then weigh himself holding this big ole ball of fluff...I was not feeling any desire for him to see my weight, then tack the cat's on top of it!

 

The poor fella is down to 16 pounds.  I am not at all sure if he will make it through the winter at this rate.  We are due for another cold snap come Monday night.  I would fatten him up on some good bacon or some such, but he turns up his nose at human food.  No, he is ecstatic to dive into his cat food every morning, then follow the kids to the dog bowl when Kelsey is fed.  He has no compunction about burying his nose in her Pedigree Healthy Weight food and going to town.

Go figure.

Speaking of unsightly jiggly in the wiggly.... 

It was 75 degrees today.  I made my former walking partner be my current walking partner and we went to burn a few calories...I'm not sure if I burned more calories walking or yacking my jaw.  I was home with a sick kid today, so I fear she had to take in a LOT of stored up words....We are expecting snow and ice come Monday and Tuesday with it staying well below freezing until Friday.  With Oliver's weight dropping at such an alarming rate, he may have to be camped in the garage for a few days.

Speaking of burning calories and wasting away:  I bought a new Jillian Michaels DVD this week.  Apparently I had an extra nine bucks burning a hole in my pocket.  Actually, I have lost my hand weights.  I ask you, how does one LOSE hand weights?  I have been doing Jillian's 30 Day Shred DVD, and I really felt that I actually needed the weights to truly justify "replacing hours in the gym with a 20 minute workout."

So, when I went to buy groceries Wednesday, I ran to the sporting goods section in Walmart...Well, not really RAN.  It was more of a lengthy hurried stride.  Which is pretty much my normal. I hurriedly walk everywhere I go....

I walked away with new hand weights and Jillian's Yoga Meltdown.  

Here's news for you!  I hate working my arms.  I consider hauling my 16 pound cat from the garage to the front door a sufficient arm workout.  Her Meltdown workout has excessive push ups.  

I swear, if she made me do one more push up to a side plank (only they aren't push ups in yoga, but I can't remember, or spell the real name.  And I'm too lazy to google it) I was going to go grab one of my brand new purple 5 pound weights and throw it through the TV.

Only my arms were too weak and wobbly to throw a weight at the TV.

Here's the good news:  The workout is tough.  I really didn't expect to be sore from a yoga workout, but it turns out that if you go an extended period without doing much with your core, and you bust out this thing, you will feel muscles deep with in your belly that you never even realized you could flex.  Only you will not realize they are there until the next morning.  Every time you breathe.  Or move.  Or sit down.  Or laugh.  Or cry in pain...

Just sayin'.

If you're looking to shed some inches I would totally recommend any of her workout DVD's.  

You can get serious results in 30 minutes or less.  And let's be real.  Who can't squeeze in 20 minutes for a workout?  Most of us spend that much time on facebook and blogging and staring at the TV, crashed out on the couch. 

 So, now that I've lectured you on your lack of exercise in life, how's about I move onto another bandwagon altogether?

I despise plastic bags.  I live in windy Oklahoma.  I challenge you to drive down the road and not see a dad gum plastic bag on a fence.  Or a high line pole.  Seriously.  They are the bane of my existence...

I actually ditched plastic bags way back in 2007. I spotted reusable bags in my local Walmart and immediately snatched them up.  I still have some of those original bags.  I have even washed them in my washer.  They lost their shape, and are kinda floppy, and the clerk has a devil of a time folding them out, but they are still usable!

My mother in law gave me an ACE hardware bag the other day.  I was sitting in Braum's eating a junior deluxe burger with my family, and had brought the bag in with plans to buy some groceries before we left...

The tag caught my eye,  and I had to share the statistics with you.  I think it will change how you look at plastic bags forever.  Here's a link to the maker of the bag if you want to learn more.

14 plastic bags contain enough petroleum to drive a car a mile.

380 billion plastic bags or wraps are thrown away in America each year.

17 cents per bag in disposal costs, wasting millions of tax dollars.

Is that not ridiculous?  Go ahead and carry your own bags in your trunk.  Carry them in with you to the store.  You will get a nice little warm fuzzy feeling that you did a small thing to make a difference today.

This lecture is now concluded.

Crock Pot Chicken

Today I'm sharing a stand by recipe I use when I have a hectic schedule, and I don't want to mess with dinner.

Except we know that come 6o'clock, the family will be expecting dinner.  As will I.  And I get cranky when I'm hungry, and never want to cook when I"m starving, which results in me snacking and spoiling my dinner while I'm preparing the meal that I don't want to cook, but feel that I must because eating out is wasteful...

Pfpfpfpf...

And while we're on the subject,  how come my friends kids meekly eat a bowl of cereal for supper, but my kids act as if I'm starving them when I mention it as an alternative to cooking?  I warn you, Gentle Reader, if you cook for your family on a regular basis, their expectations will be raised.  And sometimes you will be punished for your diligence in providing nutritious food for them.

She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls. 

Moving on:

I will first give you the recipe for the dish I made today, but then I will follow it with some change ups that I often do.  The main idea here is to use what you have.  Oh, and I have a beloved sister who's MAN does not like to eat '"yard bird.  To that I will say, try this with pork chops.  They will be tender and delicious.  For that matter, you could use pork tenderloin too, or whatever you have.  Again, pretend I'm Rachel Ray.  "Use whatever you've got.  It will be just fine."

Crock Pot Chicken
Boneless skinless chicken breasts
1/2 green bell pepper that you need to use up
1/2 onion that also needs used.
See that jar of pesto you bought with great ideas of using?  Grab it too.  The great ideas are about to flow.
Minced garlic
Salt & Pepper
Greek seasoning
Stewed tomatoes
Rice

At about 10am, place still frozen chicken breasts in your crock pot that you just bought.  You are super excited about this crock pot as it has handles that lock the lid in place.  You will be dancing around your kitchen with visions of transporting food and not living in fear it will dump at any moment.  Dance the samba as you bust it out of the box and wash it in warm soapy water...It helps ease the pain of saying goodbye to your old crock pot who's handle broke off the lid.  Twice.  It is now irreparable.

Yes, your chicken is still frozen.  You are not good at remembering to pull the chicken out the night before, and really you have all day to cook it, so just don't fret!  Yes, you will realize that the instructions in your crock pot say to never place frozen meat in it as it may not get done...Know that you have only thawed meat before putting it in a handful of times in your life, and since you are throwing this in so early, it will be done! 

Ole'!

Take the pesto and rub it onto the chicken.  I think you should use maybe 2 tablespoons, but it was all eyeballed, so you don't really know, do you?  Grab a clove of garlic and chop it and throw it on the chicken. You spy your Greek seasoning.  As you have a longstanding love affair with the stuff, it is inevitable that you will share the love with your chicken.  Sprinkle a bit on.  Next you will need to take the enormous green pepper and slice it up.  Long strips will work best.  That way you don't mistakenly place bell pepper on your child's plate.  They will not eat it.  And you will be sad because it is a waste of precious bell pepper.  Give a little wistful sigh because you wish you had more peppers...See that onion half?  Just kind of break it up and throw it in.  Remind yourself that you have stuff to get done, and speed is of the essence here.

Now, turn that crock pot on low and walk away...

She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.

When you return from picking your kids up from school (a little after 3o'clock) you will decide that you want some rice with that chicken!  Well, lucky for you, you just happen to know that you can add rice and pasta to crock pot dishes about 2 hours before needing to serve them.  Take a gander at your liquid.  Measure (okay eyeball, you never have been good at truly measuring) about 1.5 cups rice.  You will decide on this amount based on the knowledge that you will need leftovers for lunch tomorrow.  You have a family of four, so the extra half cup should leave enough for you and hubby to pack for lunch!  Sprinkle the rice around in the liquid.  You will notice that the liquid appears to be a little short for this quantity of rice. 

Here is a critical decision in your recipe.  Stirring some cream of mushroom, a package of onion soup mix and half a can of milk is always a yummy base for this.  However, you will realize that you do not have cream of mushroom.  Nor do you have dry onion soup...Time to grab that can of stewed tomatoes you keep on hand for just such situations.  Pour the tomatoes over and around the chicken making sure the rice is well covered.  Shrug to yourself and decide your body will be happy at the reduced sodium and fat content of the dish.

Let cook an additional 2 hours.  You can drop the temperature to warm if your family is not assembled and ready to eat when your rice is tender. 

Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:  "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."

Okay, so here's the change ups you can add.
Mix the rice with cream of mushroom and milk as described with a packet of onion soup mix. 
Buy wild rice.  Keep it on hand.  You will fall in love with it, and you will mourn when you realize you are out and have to use plain old white or brown for recipes.
Use tomatoes with green chilies in place of the stewed tomatoes.
Poblano peppers are fabulous in this.  Actually, any pepper is fabulous in this.  However, your small children will consume enormous amounts of water when you throw in some jalapenos from your garden.
If it's summer time, throw some thick sliced squash or zucchini in the pot.  I don't recommend the squash with the creamy rice mixture.  Stick with chicken broth for your liquid.  Also, don't throw the squash in too early, or it will be slimy mush.  Yuck!

I know I have used many other ingredients in this particular basic recipe, but these are what I can pull out of my feeble brain on short notice.

Now, here is where your persistence in finishing this entire post pays off, Gentle Reader.  The key to making this recipe truly successful is cooking extra chicken.  It has a wonderful flavor and is perfect for making chicken quesadillas, chicken pot pie, and even chicken spaghetti down the road.  Simply shred (or dice if you prefer not to soil your lovely hands with chicken bits) the chicken and place desired amounts in freezer bags, label and toss in the freezer. 

Do the mambo as you celebrate in the knowledge that you have come one tiny step closer to being a Proverbs 31 woman...

She is clothed with strength and dignity.  She can laugh at the days to come.

Excerpts of scripture are taken from Proverbs 31, New International Version

Hunters and Gatherers

Studmuffin mentioned he wanted donuts or pancakes this morning.  I was not in the mood for making pancakes.  I wasn't so hip on donuts either.  As in, my hips do not need a giant bear claw, which is what he will surely return with if he knows what's good for him.

He had the audacity to suggest I go get the donuts!

I mentioned that getting donuts clearly fell into his roll as the man of the house.  He is always priding himself on being a hunter and gatherer.  Therefore, he must go and gather some donuts to feed his family.

Okay, and I may have thrust out my chest then bent to put some dishes in the dishwasher to drive home the point.

But the important thing is he's gone to get some donuts right now.  He is fulfilling his roll as provider and I'm fulfilling my roll as trophy wife.  All is right in my world.

And while this may mean I will have a period of self loathing following my consumption of pure sugar and carbs, I will just be sure to throw in an extra workout today.

Or at least one workout.

Dear Levi Strauss

Dear Levi Strauss:

I understand that frayed jeans are all the rage right now.  I understand that all of the cool people wear jeans with tiny frayed patches on them.

What I need you to understand is that I will wear each pair of jeans that I purchase a minimum of four to five years.  The pair that I finally resigned to house cleaning and yard work only has been worn since 2004, and they were my absolute favorite jeans.  They are a pair of 515 size 10L.  While I could reasonably wear them for a while and no one would know that the crotch was in danger of disintegrating at any moment, I would hate for that disintegration to happen as I was climbing out of the car at the grocery store!  The pair of jeans I bought before that were also a 515 size 10L.  I bought them between the birth of my girls...They have paint stains in three different colors, from two different houses, the right pocket is torn loose from catching it on the tomato cage in the garden (not sure how I managed that), and sadly both knees are blown out.  They are so thin that if I run my fingernail down them, a series of small snags is left behind...

Dear Levi designers, do you understand the level of bliss my body felt each time I slipped into those perfectly shaped to fit, soft from countless washings pair of denim jeans?  Apparently you do.  That must be the reason for selling flimsy thin denim that will block no cold Oklahoma wind that comes my way. Surely your understanding of our love for broken in jeans is what spurns your current weave and fabric makeup. 

What you don't seem to understand is that the level of comfort that I found in that pair of jeans can only be achieved with multiple wearings.  No manufactured method of breaking in denim is as effective as wearing a pair for six years two to three times per week.  No amount of stretch that you cleverly sneak into each pair of jeans can equal the comfort found in a pair of well loved and well worn jeans.  The stretch is not my friend.  That tiny bit of stretch simply means that by the end of the day I will be required to wear a belt to keep them in place. 

Sadly, I conceded defeat to your machinations of selling shoddy workmanship as high fashion when I bought a forty dollar pair of jeans with a frayed spot on the right thigh and the back pocket.  They were the only pair I could find that fit in length, hip and waist and were flattering to me...

And, gleefully, they are a size 8L.  I realize that this is not a reflection of weight loss, or inches lost, as my other jeans still fit the same.  I am on to your clever schemes of making clothing larger so that we will feel better about the ever increasing waist line of our society.

Oh yes! I understand your trickery.  And, yet I succumbed.  I did a little happy dance as I zipped them into place.


So you win denim fashion industry.  You win.

But I am not happy about it.

Aside from the downsizing.  The downsizing is working out just fine for me thank you very much.

However, you can rest assured that I will wear this pair, like every other pair of jeans I've ever owned, until they are falling apart and risk causing me public embarrassment.

Sincerely,

A Loyal Yet Disgruntled Customer.

Skunks, Potty Mouths, and I Didn't Sign Up For This!

My dog got sprayed by a skunk yesterday at about 5am. I know the time because I actually smelled it in my bedroom!

I would like to announce that this is exactly one year and 8 days since my niece Sarah spotted the adorable ferret/gerbil which was actually a skunk in our culvert!

I had to change scrubs when I got to work because I could still smell skunk...

My bedroom smelled like skunk last night.

I fear that my house STILL smells like skunk, but my olfactory bulb has adjusted...Darn that rapidly adjusting sense organ!

Bookworm is pretty pumped to be on leadership at school. She is the hall monitor in the mornings and the line monitor in the lunchroom...

She heard a kid say the "P" word today. She informed the kid that he shouldn't say bad words.

"P isn't a bad word, IDIOT!"

I asked what she said to him then..."Nothing! I didn't know what to say!"

"Was he in 4th or 5th grade?"

"NEITHER!! He was in KINDERGARTEN!"

Kids these days. She was quite disillusioned. I think she realized she has been given much responsibility with no authority.

I had a "why am I nurse?" moment today....

A patient was very unstable with a massive infection in his left kidney. The urologist had tried putting a stent in the kidney and giving antibiotics. They both proved ineffective. Subsequently, the patient went into septic shock. Septic shock results in increased heart rate and massive dilation of the vessels, which causes blood pressure to drop dangerously low. Other stuff happens, but I was concerned at this moment that the patient was on 3 medications to bring up his pressure and his heart rate down and he was still only in the 80s for his systolic (top number,) and his heart rate was still in the 120s, and his platelets were 12. Platelets are needed to make your blood clot. We like them to be over 150.

Did you catch that? He was 12. We like 150...

I personally like to think that we can actually stop bleeding if it happens to occur.

"Dr, I'm not sure about putting this patient on the table. Can we do this in the ICU using ultrasound?" Translation: I really wanted this to be on the ICU nurses plate, not mine. Just bein' real here.

He looked at me with his serious face and said, "I can only do this under fluoro (that's xray to you non radiology folks). We have to bring this patient down."

"I'm a little uncomfortable with this patient's stability." Never say I give up easily.

"Andi, if we don't get this drain in his kidney, he's going to die."


Allllllllrighty then.

I went and got him. But I wanted to say, "I'm afraid he's going to die on the table."

We don't say that stuff out loud though. Instead we do our job.

And sometimes I think I'm crazy for doing it.

But when I stop and think about something so simple (if using live digital xrays to insert a line into the kidney to drain the infection is simple) can make a life or death difference....

That's pretty cool. And I'm glad God gave our doctor's the knowledge to know what to do. And I'm glad He has made me a small part of it.

So, who wants to grow up and be a nurse?

The Best Meal is the One You Didn't Cook!

Bookworm cooked Mexican Casserole for dinner tonight. She was so proud.

And she ate 3 helpings.

Just to be sure I understood how much she truly loves Mexican Casserole and how deprived she is that I don't prepare it more often. I'm now off the hook.

Guess what? I don't think any Mexicans eat Mexican Casserole. My sister Paula changed the name to green chili casserole. I'm just not politically correct that way.

Do you want the recipe?

Here ya go:

1 lb hamburger, browned.
cream of chicken
cream of mushroom
tomato sauce
green chilies

Combine all of the above, or substitute the last 2 ingredients with tomatoes with green chilies. Pour over a casserole dish lined with crushed corn chips or tortillas. Sprinkle generously with cheese. Bake at 350 until it bubbles. Let set about 10 minutes to set up.

Serve with corn, a tossed salad and salsa for garnish. My kids like to scoop the casserole onto chips.


Umm...Of course there is no picture. Why would I have a picture?

I actually ate lunch today, so I was able to come home and do a 30 Day Shred workout then eat some supper. Did I mention my lunch was at 2:45? I wasn't too hungry come supper time! Of course I ate. Hate to disappoint the little chef!

I am such a giver...