MOTHERS DAY MEMORIES & HOW TO CLEAN A TOILET

With Mother's Day on the way (tomorrow in case you forgot...) I was thinking about Mother's Day last year. Studmuffin had already moved to Oklahoma, and the girls and I were still living in La Vernia. They had lots of sweet cards and homemade gifts. The best kind.

Bookworm cooked me breakfast and served it in bed. And she cleaned up her mess in the kitchen. Pretty impressive for a 2nd grader, eh?

Popcorn was determined she was going to take me to eat. And she would pay. She was wanting to treat me to some treats and eats at Dairy Queen (DQ, I miss you...)

I was skeptical about this whole procedure, but she was very excited about the plan. We headed to DQ after church, and placed our orders. The time of truth was at hand. Popcorn turned around and said "I need your debit card, Mommy."

"What? I thought you were going to pay!"

She promptly replied "I am! But I need your debit card to pay!"

Okey Dokey.

But, seriously, that was the best junior cheeseburger and onion rings I'd had in a really long time.

Now on to more serious beeswax....

My niece Sarah recently told me how she cleans toilets. It has revolutionized my life. Seriously. If you had been on minimal toilet flush the way we were the last week or so, you would understand the value of a truly clean toilet....Can you say if it's yellow let it mellow, but if it's brown flush it down? That has been our motto for about a week. Now that we are officially flushing our toilet without fear of it coming back up, I felt that we needed a really sanitary throne. As I was scrubbing the girls toilet, I got to thinking of all the years I never even knew about this cleaning method...

And I realized I simply must share it with everyone in Bloggerland! I know you are so excited to learn about this....

Step 1: Make sure you have the proper attire. An old t-shirt with bleach stains and a faded logo works well. Perhaps even more important to your wardrobe is frizzy hair. This is an essential part of every toilet scrubbers wardrobe. Trust me on this.
By the way, the shirt I'm wearing in the above pic was a nurse appreciation gift from a hospital I used to work at. One time I wore it to a liquor store in La Vernia. My next door neighbors owned the liquor store. I swear, the way they gushed over me when I walked in, you'd think I was the prodigal returning home. When I got home Studmuffin said, "Did you wear that to the Liquor Haus?"

"Yeah, why?"

He just laughed and said, "Read your shirt babe."

Okay. Maybe I wasn't very Baptist that day....

But back to cleaning toilets.

Step 2: Take a rag and push the water out of the bowl. Seriously. Put your hand in the bowl, use a rag, and push the water out of the bowl. I don't know how that works, but it does.

Step 3: Now that you have an empty bowl, take your favorite scouring product and sprinkle it all over your bowl.

Step 4: Scrub away! The beauty of this is you know that you have gotten every nook and cranny of that bowl. Especially up under the rim, where I've always thought that commercial toilet scrubbers never really get.

Step 5: PRAY~Please God, let this all go down...Hey, I will never take a toilet flush for granted again....
Step 6: You're all done! Admire your shiny potty and know that it's as clean as it can get.


Now, don't you just feel all warm and fuzzy inside?

Me too.

NOW GO WASH YOUR HANDS!!!!! For heaven's sake....Do I have to tell you people how to do everything?

Oh. I just realized something. Many of you are having nervous twitches over my lack of gloves. Yes, gloves might be advisable. Cleaning products are hard on your skin. I have nurse hands. AKA, dry cracked skin, unpainted fingernail, short cropped nail hands...They can't get much worse than they already are..

Do you know how you can tell somebody's a nurse? She's the one who washed her hands before she went to the bathroom....And of course again after.