Conversations

Wednesday was a lovely fall day.  The kids asked me to take them to the park.  Now, I have to admit that when we go to our park, I tend to just turn them loose and sit on a sunny bench and read.  However, it was too brisk to sit on a cold concrete bench, so I decided to join them on their adventure.  You see, our park has a little forest.  I was so pleasantly surprised at how lovely the little trail was!  It is definitely a photo opportunity.

Anyway, Popcorn found one of those pods with large seeds in them that some trees have.  I don't know what they're called.  But, no, they're not locust trees.  The pods were about an inch wide and the seeds were bigger than lima beans...Anyway, one of the seeds was sprouting.

"I'm going to go home and plant it!  Then we will FINALLY have a climbing tree at our house!"

"Honey, it takes like ten years for a tree to get big enough to climb."

"Fine.  Then I will wait until I'm 19 to plant it."

So that was odd reasoning...

"Why don't you just plant it now, and then when your kids are growing up they can climb it?"

"Ufff!  Fine!  Then I will have to be overprotective and go out and watch them...It will be so ANNOYING!  Gosh!"

And I burst out laughing.

Her brain is weird.

The Rat in My Daughter's Bed

Last Thursday night was anything but restful.  First my oldest could not go to sleep.  She had creepy things on her mind, and she was upset that her American Girl doll desk had been broken in a moment of children running and screaming through the house that ended with two little girls hiding in her closet.

It matters not how or who broke the desk.  It mattered to her that she had put it in a safe place because she is super careful with all of her stuff.  It mattered to me that much to my consternation, I have somehow became the Koolaid house, and although I am the self proclaimed crankiest mom in the neighborhood, children continue to congregate at my house.  It mattered to Studmuffin because he wanted to just sleep.

She knew I got the desk at a garage sale, and would never buy her anything of that genre otherwise as I find them ridiculously over priced, if extremely well made. So, she was laying in bed, mourning the loss of her desk and realized she had forgotten to share her despair with me.  This realization resulted in her climbing in my bed to weep with me at 10:30 pm. 

Studmuffin was not the picture of sympathy. 

I ended up going and lying down with her for a few minutes in the hopes that she would calm down and sleep.  My neighbor Rebel's teenage daughter was out in her yard with friends and someone let out a typical teenage shriek.  Bookworm was certain someone was being murdered outside her window.

*SIGH*

I was unable to sleep.  She was wide awake.  Eventually we both ended up parting ways and snuggling up in our own beds with a good book.  I think I finally fell asleep around 1am. 

At 4:30 I woke up to the realization that Studmuffin was still in bed with me, and he should have already left for work.  I sat bold upright and turned to wake him up, only to discover that Studmuffin was a pillow that he had pushed against my back so that I would not miss him in bed.  How sweet.  But now I was wide awake.  Again.

It was a while before I could doze back off.  I felt as if I had barely drifted off when a blood curdling scream echoed through the house and Popcorn came thundering around the corner from her room to mine.  She burst through the door.

"THERE IS A RAT IN MY BED!"

Gentle Reader, you may find this hard to comprehend, but my heart that was already pounding from the rude awakening nearly burst out of my chest at her frantic announcement.

"Is it alive?" I asked her as I jumped out of bed and headed to her room.

"I don't know.  I think so."

Oh Gentle Reader, my brain was in over drive.  I was thinking there was no way a rat was in the house, much less in her bed, but if it was I was going to totally freak out, and obviously Kelsey is completely useless keeping vermin out of the house.

I stepped in her room, and I saw this:

Understand, Gentle Reader that this little ball of fur was in her face at 5:30 in the morning when the sun is just starting to kiss the world good morning.

I stepped closer for a better look.  I bravely snatched the rat out of the bed and carried to my room for Popcorn's perusal.

"Was this the rat you saw?"

She sheepishly affirmed that it was entirely possible that the ugliest Webkinz cat in the world may have resembled a rat in the early dawn light.  Yes.  The very cat I tried to discourage her from purchasing due to it's absolute ugliness, she happily purchased, declared a gorgeous himalayan and dubbed her "Duchess."

And of course there are no piles of "stuff" in her room in which a real rat could hide.

Nope.  Not a single one.

Boredom Leading to Productivity Leading to Angry Child

Remember I said I was going to clean out Popcorn's drawers yesterday?  Remember I said I was going to make her help me clean out toys?

 Well, I got both girls drawers cleaned and closets straightened.  However, Popcorn's room is daunting at best.  I enlisted the help of my husband for the first time ever in cleaning her paraphernalia.  To say he was surprised to see things such as this is an understatement!  This, my Gentle Reader is all too typical of things I find in her room.  That, as I'm sure you can see, is a chicken bone in a cup of shape bands with a magnetic bookmark, and various other treasures such as a retractable pencil and a Littlest Pet Shop collar!

Now what about this lovely treasure?  Well, that would be a cow tooth.  Yep.  A cow tooth.  Of course, Studmuffin has only himself to blame for this one.  He extracted it himself from a skull he found in one of the pastures.  He carried that very skull home with him so that I could put it on display in our flower bed or garden, of some such other classy place.

  

Yes, we are redneck that way. Don't hate me next summer when I have shasta daisies growing out the eye holes of my very own cow skull!

So, I'm sure you can imagine I was not at all surprised to find this lovely rubber fish that is really intended as a lure gracing her nightstand, proudly displayed for all visitors to see.  There was also an assortment of rubber worms, lizards, and even craw fish!  Oh, the wonderful things that we have seen!  

When we put our house on the market in South Texas, I decided to do all of the deep cleaning and decluttering that only occurs in the event of selling a house and moving.  I found a perfectly complete cardinal nest with feather's included in her bedroom window, hidden behind her blinds and curtain.  I was rather dismayed as I had specifically instructed her over a year before that "No, you may not bring that bird's nest in the house.  Birds carry mites."  Silly me.  I thought those instructions were perfectly clear and easily carried out.  I did not realize that a five year old translates that to "Hide the bird's nest in your window so your mother won't find it."

Obviously her collecting things is nothing new.  She has brought home complete mouse skeletons that an owl regurgitated.  That was just too precious.  Let me tell you. Maybe almost as precious as the countless turkey feathers she has brought in.  Or how about the fake aquarium she made out of a gallon Ozarka bottle?  She had her daddy poke holes in the lid, filled it with water, and suspended glow in the dark fishing worms on string and put fake rubber plants and some pebbles in the bottom.  She tied little pieces of plastic to the ends of the string so she could make the fish bob up and down in the water.  Paula thought they were dead fish floating when she first saw that lovely creation.  Silly me, I didn't think to photograph that before it finally got tossed.                        

The lovely little cups you see perched on her doll trunk are cups she endeavored to rescue from the trash after our Christmas Eve candlelight service.

Our cleaning spree led to the realization that no matter how clean Popcorn's room is, and how many party favor toys and kids meal toys I tossed out, her room was over crowded.  This called for serious measures.

Drastic measures to be exact.

We decided to tear apart the bunk beds in Bookworm's room and move the queen bed out of Popcorn's room which always serves as the guest room. This was a sad task.  It was like saying goodbye to a piece of their childhood.  No longer will they be climbing up the ladder when company comes over and hanging upside down off of the top bunk to share secrets.

Or fighting over who has to sleep on the top bunk.... 

 

This is the final result.  As you can see it's a relatively small bedroom.  

My daughter had an absolute fit and said I completely ruined her room.  Apparently she feels she will be too confined in a twin size bed.  I do not doubt this as I've found her completely sideways in her bed when I woke her in the morning.  And I ask you, what can possibly be done to ruin a lime green room?  There is so much personality in that color alone!

And when my mother called to check on the kids today, and ask if I was feeling better, I told her all about my feeling betterness and the productivity it led to...

She replied, "So where will I sleep when I come stay?"

I just can't win.

Gentle Reader, I informed her that we had already discussed that when our parents came, they could have our bed and we'd take the air mattress, and anyone else under the age of 60 should be okay on the air mattress. We are also hoping to buy new couches soon, perhaps one with a sleeper sofa.  After all, our couches are only 13 years old.  However, if my children do not get well so I can actually go to work, we will not have money for new sleeper sofa couches!

And, no, I do not appreciate further complaints from family members who may be planning on staying with us. 

Just for future reference.

And for the record my mother informed me that they will NOT sleep in our bed.

I will end this post in the wisdom of Charlie Brown:

Oh good grief.

Tooth Fairy Tales

I think I've touched on this topic before...

It's just so dang funny, I keep thinking about it, and I laugh every time. And if you don't Gentle Reader...well, I fear you are just a stick in the mud.

That's right! I said it! A stick. In the mud.

I know I've told you all about Popcorn debunking the Easter bunny...

I know I've told you about the last time the Tooth Fairy failed to show in a timely manner...

However, today I was rambling at work, and I remembered a conversation we had a few days after the Easter Bunny was debunked.

Popcorn: Mom. I have a loose tooth. The Tooth Fairy is real, okay?

Me: Okay. Why are you telling me this?

Popcorn: I just thought you should know.

And then she did this:







Which just happens to be the exact expression I give her when I'm trying to convey the seriousness of a situation and she better hurry up double quick and do what I say. Or dire consequences will soon follow.

I wonder what her dire consequences were going to be for that poor Tooth Fairy if she failed to show?

I think the curls give everyone fair warning.

Popcorn has been begging for a perm for two years. I finally decided to let her get one...

And then I found out that they start out at $55!!!

YIKES!!!

So, being the tightwad that I am, I begged my mom to do it for her.

Because that's the kind of gal I am.

Last weekend we went to see them, and while Bookworm checked cattle with my dad and rode through the cattle on her horse, my mom slaved over Popcorn's hair.

I always loved when my mom washed my hair. She was a "beauty operator" back in the day. She owned a shop by our house, and closed it after I was born. Getting a good head scrub/massage by my mom while she washes your hair is the best!

After she washed it, she decided to trim the ends. Good idea. It hadn't been trimmed in several months. The challenge to sit still began. Not an easy job for a kid who's blog name is "Popcorn" in direct comparison to her personality.

Then, we had to let the preconditioner set...

At this point, all is cool with her world.

Still feelin' cool as Grandma is still rolling her hair...

By the way, we are already over an hour into this process.

Okay. I'm obviously not feeling so cool. She is having total melt down at this point. Remember the burn of a perm?

And, no. I hadn't washed my hair in approximately to 3 days when this picture was taken.

I wish I could pretend this was out of the norm.

But it's not.

I consider washing my hair optional, and to be done a maximum of twice weekly.

True story.

Oh, and please disregard those Rustler jeans I'm wearing. They are a holdover from high school, and my mom keeps them around for when I come home. It's handy to have them there for riding horses...

Aren't those high pockets lovely? And let me assure you, even though those are men's jeans, they go ALL. THE. WAY. to my waist.

Speaking of, I think this may give you a clue as to why they called me Steve Irkle in high school.

And Peewee Herman.

And why I refuse to tuck in a shirt to this day....All legs, short waist, short torso, monkey arms.

Enough said.

At this point, the smell is so bad she can taste it.

Lucky for her my Grandma Irene came to see the excitement.

And, in typical Grandma Irene fashion, she had a stash of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and Almond Joys in her car.

Because that's the kind of grandma she is...

The chocolate helps remove the icky taste, ya know.

Plus, this meant I got to eat an Almond Joy for no apparent reason other than moral support.

That's just the kind of mom I am.

Full of support and Almond Joy.

I think the two hours worth of fidgeting/hair pulling/scalp burning was worth her suffering.

Plus, that curly wild hair gives people a peak into her personality before it explodes all over them...

You know the phrase "I got a wild hair?" Well, Popcorn lives a life of wild hair ideas.

So, I guess this hair is fair warning.

Although it is quite possible those wild hairs come from my side of the family.

And, yes, in typical Lumberjack's Wife fashion, I posted a picture of a picture. Although I did not copy this idea from her, I was already doing it when she started doing it. However, I don't want her to think I'm copying her, and not giving credit...

I think it's particularly nice that I left the caption from my scrapbook in it.

And, no, I was not helping them clean the kitchen. Someone needs to immortalize these shenanigans for all posterity on film.

Besides, I HATE taking care of leftover meat. And, as the youngest, I'm fairly adept at avoiding tasks I don't like.

Maybe Dawn hates leftover meat too.

Perhaps that's why she's holding a knife to Paula's throat.

Leftover meat can lead to desperate actions.

Where the Wind Comes Sweeping Down My Moat!

It's windy today. Wow! I bet that's big news to any of you who realize I live in Oklahoma. However, I am just not sure any of you non-Okies can truly understand the power of our wind. Last Friday we had 60 to 70 mph winds. It literally rattled my windows. Oh, and it had torrential rain with it, and my kitchen window, which has never leaked before, leaked a river of water that literally ran onto the counter below. Lovely. I guess it was because the wind was out of the south, and that window faces south. Please, God, don't make me replace windows on this castle right now...

Speaking of our castle, Popcorn ran to check the mail today. She decided to cross the moat by leaping over it rather than taking the long, boring way down the driveway. Because, clearly, driveways are BORING!!! She's always looking to add a little spark to her life. Like the time I found her walking the ledge of our above ground pool like it was a balance beam. Life was really exciting when she discovered this was very likely going to result in a spanking of epic proportions...

Anyhoo, she decided to jump the moat. Only the wind is blowing. Really hard. Like, it's a beautiful day, and I needed to do yard work since I'm home with a sick kid today, but the wind is ridiculous...

Like, really ridiculous. Ridiculous enough to blow her over mid-jump and make her land in the moat...

Did you forget about my moat? Well, it has had an update since I originally posted pictures for you (click here for a refresher.)



You see, the city streets and planner guy of our humble town was finally sick of hearing me complain to him about the drainage that goes to my front yard, then stops because lo and behold water won't run uphill to the pond behind our house....

So, during the last heavy snow, he and his crew showed up with a back hoe and a dump truck and they dug this lovely ditch in my yard.

Ain't it a beaut!? The ground was so saturated when they began this endeavor that the water was literally pouring out underneath the back of the truck and running in a river right back to my yard. Our conversation was as follows:

Me: So, you decided to work on the drainage today?
City Streets Guy (CSG): Yep. We saw all the water standing in your neighborhood, and thought if we did this ditch out a little more, ti will at least let the water out from further up the street.
Me: But now it has nowhere to go. Are you planning on driving that backhoe through our yard today to correct the drainage at the back of my yard?
CSG: Oh no! It's way too wet for that. We just are out here for a few minutes to do what we can to let some of this water start this way...

I left in utter exasperation. Need I remind all of you that the main street south of our house has a drainage ditch on either side of it, AND it's at a lower elevation, but because the original developer "platted and did easements" for the water to drain to the back of our subdivision our city will never change it? Even if the plan makes no sense? And, because "all your neighbors have their driveways in now, and we'd have to tunnel under them to make it drain that way."

My heart bleeds...

Okay. I'm done with that rant for a few days at least. I'm sorry you must be burdened with this on such a regular basis. You see, I have to gripe to you, or Studmuffin gets wound up too, and that creates too much stress in the house, so with him I pretend the problem doesn't exist. Even when I'm hauling buckets of water out of the bathtub...

Yeah. Denial is a great coping mechanism for me...

However, let's not leave you with the mental image of my moat. Let's focus on this lovely young redbud....

No! No! Don't look down at the dandelions!!! They will remind you that I should have been doing yard work instead of napping today!

Instead, let's focus on the lovely crocus that started to bloom today. Did you know I almost dug these up last year because they never bloomed? Thank heavens I was too lazy to get that done!


I think those are irises to the side. However, they never bloomed last year either. My neighbors up the street (an older couple who I adore) told me they may not have been planted right by the previous owners...However, maybe it was an off year, so we'll see what blooms this year!

BTW, I went over to thank them for the butterfly bush I found lying in my yard on Friday night. It turns out they had put it there Thursday evening, and "told my nanny about it" who forgot to tell me.

But, I was totally okay with that, seein' as how Emmett & Katherine totally get that I'm a trophy wife, and so I need not only a nanny, but a home delivery service for yard beautification...

Either that, or they totally wish I'd do something to fix this place up, and in desperation they're leaving random bushes in my yard!

I obviously prefer the first theory.

Oh, one final thing.

I DO NOT DO FARMVILLE PEOPLE!!!

I blocked the application so nobody can even invite me. First, I'm shocked and offended that you have learned so little about me. Remember me? I'm the gal who will not see movies everyone must see, or read the book that will change my life, because really, I don't want to be a better person? That same gal stayed away from facebook until my hubby created an account for me, and basically the only time I go over there is when someone friends me. So. There you have it. Now, I expect no more comments about being disappointed in my farming habit that doesn't even exist!

And yes.

Apologies are expected.

The End.

Flip Flop Wars

Popcorn has a flip-flop habit.

It actually started at a very early age...

When she was about four she would insist on wearing flip flops everywhere. One day I was to take her to her daycare, since I had to go to work for some training. Normally her daddy took her to daycare, and picked her up, since daycare is not open for 14 hours at a stretch.

Anyway, her sister was at school, and it was time for Popcorn to get her shoes on so we could go...

She showed up in a pair of Strawberry Shortcake flip flops. Yes, I remember the pair...

Me: You can't wear those to school. You will get stickers in your feet, and it is against the rules.

Popcorn: I want to wear these. Other kids wear sandals and flip flops! I AM wearing these!

Me: Other kids do not have me for a mommy. The rules for daycare are no open toed shoes, and no boots. Go put your tennis shoes on.

Popcorn: I HATE tennis shoes! I want to wear flip flops! (She is stomping into her bedroom.) When I am a mommy, I will NEVER let my kids even own flip flops! NEVER! They will only wear tennis shoes. My kids will never wear flip flops....

And she took off her flip flops and threw them across the room, put on her shoes and stomped out the door...

Gentle Reader, we pause in this post to bring you a reminder of how Popcorn thinks "A Great Mommy" will be. Please, please click here to read all about that....

I know you haven't clicked it yet...

Could you just humor me here? Click!

Clickety, click click!!!

Oh, I give up....Returning to this post...


She still loves sandals and flip flops. She claims her feet get claustrophobic (hot and squeezed) in tennis shoes. She begs to wear sandals. She begs to wear flip flops.

At our school here in Oklahoma, they are allowed to wear anything to school as long as they have something to change into for P.E.

I, being stubborn, disagree with this rule. I think she needs shoes that offer protection on. I think she needs to wear a shoe that completely covers her foot. Even if she can change for P.E., what a hassle for the teacher to wait for everyone to change shoes before they begin...

Today she offered a compromise:

She would wear tennis shoes, but pack flip flops to change into after P.E.

For a minute, I was stumped on how to handle this, but then a revelation came to me. I played my trump card.

Me: Do you think Daddy wants you to wear flip flops to school?

P: No. (said in a mumbling whisper)

Me: Do you think he would be irritated if he found out you wore them to school?

P: Yes. (again, mumbling and now shuffling feet)

Me: Do you think you should just wear tennis shoes all day?

P: (with a big sigh) Yes.

And, she went off to school.

But, I did spy a pair of these in the floor of the back seat....





Now, I'm not saying she was contemplating wearing them anyway, they could have been there for days, and I just noticed them.

But, it still gave me a chuckle when I saw them.

P.S. My girls have been using my camera. Isn't it amazing how beautiful weeds can look? Welcome, Spring!!!

Toes in the Freezer

Just now I had the most amazing conversation with Popcorn.

She was preparing a bowl of ice cream. Because, after all, ice cream is apparently necessary when it is a whopping 28 degrees outside.

I was preparing myself a cup of organic green tea. The organic is not really necessary to my existence. Neither is the green part, for that matter. Really, the only necessary ingredient to my existence is the caffeine. And the heat. Coffee would have been preferable.

However, I am out of coffee.

Well, that's not strictly true. I have some disgusting Walmart brand coffee that I made the mistake of buying. I plan to return it the next time I make a 6am run to Walmart. That's truly the best time to go because nobody else is there. But, other than truly disgusting Walmart coffee, I am out of coffee.

Because my wretched family drank it all when they were here.

Not that my family is wretched. As a matter of fact, my family is wonderful, and I'm more than happy to share a cup of coffee with them. It is only when I'm desperately needing my 4pm cup of coffee, and remember I'm totally out until I run to the store tonight that they become a wretched family. Because, clearly, it's all about me.

But the point of this post is not that I'm out of coffee. It's not that it's cold outside. It's not even that my child feels the need to eat ice cream when it's cold outside. The point of this post can be summed up in one statement made by Popcorn as she got out the ice cream:

"That feels good. You know, there's just never a bad time to stick your toes in the freezer!"

There you go. Next time your wretched family has drank all of your coffee, and it is time for a 4pm caffeine fix, just stick your toes in the freezer and all will be right with the world.

Ice Skating

Popcorn turned 8 last Wednesday! Happy belated birthday, Popcorn!

Of course, I didn't forget her birthday, I just haven't had the chance to blog about our adventures! we started the day with a birthday wish on OK43 from the news crew there. Yes, I am fabulous. I will not mention the fact that I kept submitting it wrong, and I finally got it in at 8:55 am, and the very last thing they mentioned as they went off the air at 9am was "Happy 8th birthday Mindy." But, hey! It was said, and she heard it!


We met Studmuffin at CiCi's for lunch. I was so excited when she picked an all you can eat pizza, pasta, salad, and DESSERT buffet. I just love it when my kids are practical...And cheap. It brings a tear of joy to a mama's eye, I'm tellin' ya.



We invited a little friend to go skating with us. My girls had ice skated once before, but now that they have roller blades, they seemed to pick up the ice skating pretty quick. They each claim to have hardly fallen at all. If that is the case, I ask you to please disregard the wet spots on their jeans.


Have you ever noticed that kids will tramp through the snow even if there is a perfectly cleared sidewalk right next to them?


Also, this little birthday girl is practically incapable of walking right next to me anywhere. However, she is VERY capable of posing prettily at the sight of a camera.

We finished the day with her favorite supper: Spaghetti. We had store bought cupcakes since we were having a party for her on January first. She was just as happy with them as homemade... But I wasn't.


Oh! I'm sure you're wondering how I did ice skating. I did pretty well over all. I only had one big fall. But that was enough. When I hit the ice on my knees, my stomach rolled, and I seriously thought I was going to puke. But I didn't. I got up as quickly as I could so as not to draw attention to myself, and "skated it off." Of course, I didn't stop. I'm just not much of a spectator. Now, I fell a few other times. Once just to my hands because I hadn't realized my skate had come untied. I quickly remedied that. Another time I fell on my bottom. Popcorn had stopped to talk with me. As she skated off, she cut behind me. She lost her balance and grabbed my by the back of my coat. My skates flew out from under me, and I landed on my bottom. Of course, the only evidence of my scrapes is my knees.



Now it's a lovely shade of yellowish-green and purple. It was originally a 2nd knee cap on the inside of my knee. It looks a lot worse now, but it feels much better.

By the way, for any of you who may be wondering. It sure did hurt a lot worse to fall as an adult than I remember.

How to Interpret Body Language

Yesterday I was laying on Popcorn's bed with her, talking about our day and the wonderful times we were having....

Popcorn: Where did you get your gum?
Me: In my stocking.
P: Who gave it to you?
Me: Santa.
P: You're lying!!!
Me: No I'm not! Why would I be lying? I got gum in my stocking from Santa!
P: I know you lied...
Me: Why do you say I lied?
P: When I asked who gave it to you, you rolled your eyes to the left. Looking to the right means you're thinking. The left means you're lying. So, you lied about who gave you the game.
Me: Well, I'm not lying. I got the gum in my stocking. From Santa.

Now. I ask you, Gentle Reader, why does my child, who is only 7 years old, know that eyes to the left means deception? I didn't even know that, but when she said it, it sounded familiar. I decided to google body language, and I learned she was right!

Here is a quote from WikiHow: You can usually tell if a person is remembering something or making something up based on their eye's movements. When someone is remembering details, their eyes move to the right (your right). When someone is making something up, their eyes move to the left.

Here is the link to learn more about body language, and how to interpret it. Now, go! Learn! Implement your knowledge! I will be using my new-found knowledge to convince my 2nd grader that I am not a liar... You can use yours however you feel fit...

Update and more conversations

I thought I'd give you a quick update on Popcorn. She has not had fever since 3am Friday. She did vomit twice yesterday, but it was mostly due to drainage. Today she played, but wore out easily. I think we will all be at church tomorrow!

Bookworm has been in a great mood today, and survived going to school twice without her sister. She helped me make salsa today, and helped Studmuffin wash his boat. She has been wound up like an 8 day clock all day. I'm blaming the cool front coming in.

Last night Popcorn informed me that she lost her tooth on Monday, and the Tooth Fairy had not deigned to visit. "I'm going to be very angry if she doesn't come tonight, Mom. It will be 5 nights then!"

"Why are you telling me this?"

Looking at me from under her lashes, she replied, "I don't know. I just thought you should know that I will be angry..."

Then this morning, she came into my bathroom waving a dollar bill and a Sacajawea dollar. "Where'd ya get those?" I asked in all innocence.

"The Tooth Fairy finally came! And she brought me an extra dollar!" The Tooth Fairy always gives Sacajawea dollars to my kids.

"Maybe she was waiting until you were better so she wouldn't catch the flu."

"No, Mom." At this point she rolled her eyes at me, then thought better of her response. "I think she just had lots of kids to visit!"

"Yeah, me too..."

No way is she giving up the Tooth Fairy like she ditched the Easter Bunny....I don't think she's at all sure she'll still get cash for lost teeth!

Speaking of the Tooth Fairy....

When Bookworm was in first grade, she lost her tooth, and of course, the Tooth Fairy remembered to come the very first night! The next morning Bookworm proudly displayed her Sacajawea dollar. "I saw the Tooth Fairy last night. I know who she is," said Popcorn with all the authority her 5 year old self could muster.

"No you didn't!" replied her indignant sister. "You are supposed to be asleep, or she won't come...Just like Santa, so there is no way you saw the Tooth Fairy."

"Yes I DID!!!" Now her integrity was in question and she was becoming angry...Never mind that truth often resembles a rubber band with her...It can be stretched quite a bit, and still be a rubbber band as far as she's concerned.

"Oh, yeah? Then what does she look like?"

"She's purple with purple and white striped tights, a dark purple dress, and wings, with a crown on her head, and she's this big!" She held her fingers up and indicated a size of about 2 inches.

Well, such a definitive answer shut up any protestations from her sister. I myself was pretty amazed at such a quick detailed answer....

Until the next time I did laundry and folded their clothes...and noticed a small fairy exactly matching the description on the front of Bookworm's sweat shirt...You just never know where that kid is going to get the next rabbit to pull out of her hat.

The Agony of Her Art...

Popcorn has decided to become a song writer.

Aren't you just dying to read what she's written so far?

Well, I'm about to share it with you, but I must warn you she labored over this song through an entire sermon, and for about 5 minutes at home. "Daddy, it is so hard to write a song. I am just worn out."

I chuckled when I heard her talking to her Dad about it, but didn't have time to read it right then. This morning I decided to read her masterpiece, and I was so impressed, I decided to share it with all of you:

Popcorn's Song

You are my angle. I have loved you all my life I chrid to keep you out of danger. So will you come back for me? I want you back plese.

Come back.
Ooh come back.
Come back.
Come back.

My song, mack it lode tell me wate you are talken bout.
Why? Why?
Because I side and side that's why.
So just do it and do it agin and agin.
Do it and do it agin.

So just come back...pece.

Why are you here angl? Because she rasd me that's why
So just follow me or esee nothing.

You will get nothing, that's what you'll get. You can chang your mind, you can chang yoru clots, noting can chang yoru world or can take out God.

by: Popcorn

Is that just amazing or what? I tried to type it completely as she wrote it on the back and front of 2 bulletins and one note book paper, but I did try to make it into correct phrases. She did the punctuation, even the dot dot dot. She also did her own periods and apostrophe's! Hey, her spelling needs some work, but not bad for a 7 year old, who is not listening to the sermon, eh?

Good to be home

The last night we were in San Antonio, we went to Gruene (pronounced green...It's how Texans tell the locals from the tourists). We visited the world famous Gruene Hall. It's a really cool building with an old fashioned bar, wooden bench tables and pool tables. Out back there are basketball goals with dirt courts. And on weekends, they offer free outdoor concerts. Many of you have actually seen Gruene Hall and may not remember it. Remember the Travolta movie "Michael?" Well, the scene where he walks by and a woman comments on his smell and Andie MacDowell replies, "It's sugar cookies. He smells like sugar cookies." Or something like that, then he goes out on the dance floor and does his Travolta dancing thing that is sure to make millions of women swoon was shot in Gruene Hall.

But, returning to my original subject, we had dinner at the "Gruene River Grill." It's a great, atmospheric restaurant that looks like it was an old stable, or mill or something. The ceiling seems entirely too high for a stable, unless it had a loft...Bookworm was exhausted and totally burnt out on eating out. Of course the kids menu was your standard corn dog, chicken strips, mac & cheese thing. She decided to order from the adult menu, but decided everything was equally unappealing. She wanted chips and queso. I let her order it for her dinner, and then made her eat some of my grilled chicken and garlic mashed potatoes.

I was pretty sick of eating out myself by the time we got home. Who knew microwave popcorn on a Sunday night in your own house could taste so good? Or what about frozen waffles with Skippy Natural Super Chunk peanut butter and syrup is so satisfying? Then, even though we went to the store this morning the girls and I had simple grilled cheese sandwiches with grapes and Nacho Cheese Doritos for lunch. It was like food from heaven. Isn't it great when you return from a trip and you are so appreciative of your own food and kitchen, that even if it's nothing special, it's totally wonderful?

I was so glad to be back home with my own groceries, I spent extra long planning the next 2 weeks menu because it was nice just sitting and thinking about what I wanted to cook. I looked through cook books and my own stash of recipes and tried to be somewhat creative with our meals. Of course, the girls will probably not be nearly as appreciative of the extra love and care that I put into their little bellies. But I'm okay with that, because at least it won't be corn dogs, chicken strips or mac & cheese.

So, long story short, it's good to be home.....

Personalities

It always amazes me how kids show personalities in ways you never expect. The girls went and stayed a few days with my parents last week. They had a great time visiting all of my old haunts. They worked on the fort down at the trees. They hiked around the cliffs and carved their names in the side. And they found the owls nest. Apparently the owl builds her nest in a tree now and not under a ledge on the cliff wall anymore. They called home and told us all about the wonderful souvenirs they found. Of course, they brought their new treasures home.

Bookworm gave her treasure careful consideration and she brought home...




Some lovely rocks to enjoy and use for decoration in her room! Aren't they lovely?




Popcorn gave her treasure equally earnest consideration.....


Yep. You guessed it. She brought home mouse bones and bird feathers. How exciting. How precious. How....how.....how....Well, it's typical Popcorn.

Popcorn may go a million miles an hour, but she sleeps hard. When she was a baby she slept 18 hours a day. I took her to the doctor because she slept so much. She was running around on her little chubby baby legs, laughing, and talking gibberish. He looked at me with exasperation and said, "Your baby is fine. Just be glad that she sleeps and doesn't go like this more hours in the day."

She still sleeps hard and needs more sleep than her sister. One time when she was 4 I found her asleep in a doll crib. It was maybe the size of a baby bassinet, and she was hanging out on all 4 sides, but she had crammed herself in there and was fast asleep.



Bookworm on the other hand hasn't taken a nap since she was probably 3. I always made her lay down for quiet time until she started school, but she would just lay in her bed and read. I made her lay down to rest before her slumber party, and that is what she did that day. Until she heard me coming, then she crammed her book under her pillow and tried to fake a deep sleep. When she heard the camera, she immediately sat up and asked me what I was doing....

BUSTED!!!

What I found in Popcorn's bed

So, the final step in separating the girls is washing their bedding. They still have to separate stuffed animals, babies, and jewelry, but that won't take long, and I have no idea where I will put babies and stuffies in Popcorn's room, unless it's under the bed.

Anyway, here's a list of things in Popcorn's bed (including all bedding that belongs there)

Bubble wrap
18 stuffed animals
6 books
Bubble gum tape
a pedometer
various baby clothes and blankets
a tooth...A real tooth. She pulled it and couldn't remember where she put it!
scissors
markers
journal
a doll trunk
lots and lots of trash....

How on earth did she sleep with all of that in her twin bed?

Gift Bags

Popcorn has a tendency to get attached to things. Things that I consider junk. Like a rock. A rubber lizard. A teeny tiny seashell. A bird nest that is carefully wrapped in tissue paper and stored in a shoebox in the closet. Don't tell Studmuffin about that last one. He told me to throw it out. I thought it was too sweet to trash. The same as the cardinal feathers I found in her window sill. There is a strict rule of "no feathers in the house. They carry mites." But, when you find the feathers so carefully hidden, and you know they've been there for months, because you remember forbidding them in the house, it's like, what's the point now? The damage is done.

Well, Popcorn tends to feel the same way about certain gift bags. She had a Scooby Doo gift bag that belonged to "this family" and we could not use it for anyone who did not reside in this house,because then we'd no longer have the Scooby Doo gift bag, and she liked it. Every time I wrapped a present for anyone at all, she would hunt me down and say, "Mommy, please don't use the Scooby Doo bag, that bag needs to stay in the family." And I would find it amusing, so I kept it...Remember, I'm cheap, and I love free stuff (click here to read more.) I feel very passionately about this when it comes to gift bags. My goal in life is to never actually buy gift bags, but to repurpose (how green am I?) them for the next present.

Well, the last party the girls were invited to, I made Popcorn part with the bag. Number One, it was time to leave for the party, and we were frantically wrapping the present. I had no gift wrap, so this was our only option, short of bags with poinsettias or baby motifs. She was upset, but decided to make the sacrifice for the love of her friend.

Tonight we were frantically looking for wrap or a bag for the gift she needs for a party she's going to tomorrow. She is going to the party from the babysitter's since I have to work, so I can't exactly wrap it and take it their tomorrow. Our bag supply has not improved because, alas, nobody has received a gift since last time.

Aha! We have bags the right size!

Dangit!

Houston, we have a problem....The bag is yet another bag that she loves. This time it's Tweety.

Okey dokey...I'm calm. I'm patient. I'm loving.

Aha! Strawberry Shortcake....

Dadgummit...

This one is too babyish. Popcorn doesn't like Strawberry Shortcake, so neither will Amanda.

How about this one?

Too Valentine-ish.

This one?

It's boring. Just a plain brown gift bag. And no. She's not going to decorate it herself. She doesn't "feel like it."

I'm calm. I'm patient. I'm loving....

Then she spies it....A Taz gift bag! That's perfect!

Happy, happy, joy, joy....

What?

It turns out the Taz bag is the Tweety bag...Different picture on the other side....

No. She doesn't want to use it. It's the family bag. She wants to have this bag in our house.

I'm calm. I'm patient. I'm loving...

I honestly did not lose my temper. I know. My tolerance is nothing short of a miracle.

We finally did find a bag. We settled on one that is way too big for the present.

Only to discover that I'm out of tissue paper.

Dangit, dangit, dangit, dangit!

We found some packing paper, fluffed it just so, and called it good.

*WHEW!*

So, to all interested parties who may be purchasing presents from my children: Please send gift bags. I'm cheap, I like to reuse gift bags, and I'm too lazy to wrap gifts, plus my brain is too weak to remember to buy bags or wrap at the store. So please, please include a cute bag with your gift. I promise it will be put to good use...Unless it is too baby-ish, or Valentiney, or Christmas themed, or Popcorn becomes inexplicably attached to it, in which case it will be looked at every time I drag out the wrap box, but will be forbidden to be used...

In review: The bag should be cute, but not so cute Popcorn becomes attached. The bag cannot be too big or too small. Avoid themes if at all possible, because they will inevitably be the wrong ones. Unless it's the right theme, in which case we will have it for all time, because it will become a "family bag, that needs to be in our house."

Thank you for your consideration in this matter. Remember: My problems are your problems.

Kids Kamp

Bookworm leaves for Kids Kamp today. The girls decided to practice camping last Friday night. They were determined they were going to sleep in the "back back yard." Translation: outside the fence.

Now normally, I would have said fine, no big deal. However, a few weeks ago a coyote came onto my neighbors back porch and snatched their Maltese right in front of them. It was late at night, they had let the pooch out to potty, and my neighbor had the porch light on, standing just inside her french door, watching her. Can you imagine her horror when Cotton ran up on the porch, ready to come in, and a coyote dashed up on the porch, snatched her and ran off? That is just a little too bold, even for a sturdy country girl like me. So, I insisted they sleep inside the fence.


But, back to the subject: Kids Kamp. Bookworm is very excited. So am I. But, of course I'm nervous for her. Our church is fairly large, but we only have three 3rd grade girls. And, only one other 3rd grade girl is going. She and Bookworm aren't that close, plus the other girl's mother informed me, "I'm having Chloe take a friend, so she will have someone to play with at camp." I had just verbalized that I was really glad Chloe was going so Bookworm would have a kid her own age to play with. I was stunned into silence at that statement. I'm sure she didn't mean it rude. It was actually smart. Why the heck didn't I think to have my kid invite a friend to go with her? Duh.
I'm sure she is going to do just fine. I always loved camp. And I grew up in a very small church, where I was basically the only kid who attended regularly, and I still loved it. Of course, Bookworm isn't as assertive as me. She's not shy, but she also isn't the kind to just run up to a group of kids and join in a game that she thinks looks fun. Even at our own VBS I had to instruct her to go up to the rec youth worker and tap her on the shoulder and ask if she could play the game of keep away that had started in the gym when our craft was finished WAY too early for them to go to their next station. Bookworm was just too nervous to go up and join in without being specifically invited.


So, obviously I'm going to miss her and fret over whether she's having fun for the next 4 days. She returns Thursday evening. My dog Kelsey is sure going to miss her. I'm sure she'll be fretting over where she is when the rest of the pack is at home where it belongs. Kelsey is just a worrier that way.


I can tell you another thing. This little goofball is definitely going to miss her sister. They really are best friends. They spend every minute of every day together in the summer. In fact, they've spent so much time together lately that they are starting to bicker all the time. I think I'm going to put them in separate rooms. That way, they can at least have their sleep time apart, and have their own space to go to when they need alone time. Not that Popcorn ever needs alone time. Seriously, this kid is going to REALLY miss her sister.

So am I.